' 83 (Octopussy, Rocky 3, The A Team)
So what profession are you in now then? Something that involves pitting yourselves against chavs and lurking around the market "like a pervert.. yes, lurking around like some sort of pervert" (copyright, Mrs Hall, Hartismere and Debenham Sixth Form 1996). Are you by any chance a kind of a Norfolk version of Del Boy, with a suitcase of hooky gear and a shit van?
Well, today is a very easy day for me... I only have to teach 2 classes and they are both full of beans and inquisitive. The Koean and Taiwanese girls in the second class are wonderfully saucy and are experts at pushing the envelope, collecting purikura (short for "print club", meaning little photo stickers from garish machines) and the eating of green tea ice cream. The kids in the first class are a little more mischievous but really want to learn English.. unfortunately, during a previous class teaching them about commands, one of the girls came up with "turn me on!" so now they all shout it at me whenever they see me. Thank God there is no one in this school other than me capable of understanding the implied meaning...
School life here is utterly different to Hartismere. Ballantyne's rule about standing before she came in would be seen as rather lacklustre here, as teachers here walk in the room, shout "staaaand!" then "attentioooon!" and finally "bow!" and woe betide any scallywag that doesn't do it. Personally I don't do this, although the class leaders of some of the classes I teach do it automatically. Another difference is the amount of extra curricular activities. Here, if you are in a sports team, you do that sport before and after school almost every day of the year (and literally everyday of the year if you are in a prestigious club like tennis or golf). It was announced yesterday that a number of the students in my department not affiliated with clubs would be taking part in the "Christmas Volunteer" program (which, I assume, is where they will spend their precious winter holiday picking up litter and generally doing menial shit around the city, not that they have any real choice in the matter).
Can you imagine what would have happened if they had said to us, back in the December of 95, "by the way lads, you're in the Christmas volunteer program, so report to the front office every day at 8am and walk around wearing a big ribbon stabbing rubbish with a pointed stick." It wouldn't have been pretty..
Incidentally, next Friday will be a huge day. The CEO of Microsoft (that is, the man one step down from Chairman Bill Gates) is coming to our school, and I have to prepare a written history of the school and generally be on hand to create a good impression. It's in every sense a huge deal and is possibly the most important moment in the school's long history of important moments (due to the potential for partnerships and business associations in the future). Here's hoping I don't go all Allan Partridge and make him smell a big cheese on a fork...
Well, today is a very easy day for me... I only have to teach 2 classes and they are both full of beans and inquisitive. The Koean and Taiwanese girls in the second class are wonderfully saucy and are experts at pushing the envelope, collecting purikura (short for "print club", meaning little photo stickers from garish machines) and the eating of green tea ice cream. The kids in the first class are a little more mischievous but really want to learn English.. unfortunately, during a previous class teaching them about commands, one of the girls came up with "turn me on!" so now they all shout it at me whenever they see me. Thank God there is no one in this school other than me capable of understanding the implied meaning...
School life here is utterly different to Hartismere. Ballantyne's rule about standing before she came in would be seen as rather lacklustre here, as teachers here walk in the room, shout "staaaand!" then "attentioooon!" and finally "bow!" and woe betide any scallywag that doesn't do it. Personally I don't do this, although the class leaders of some of the classes I teach do it automatically. Another difference is the amount of extra curricular activities. Here, if you are in a sports team, you do that sport before and after school almost every day of the year (and literally everyday of the year if you are in a prestigious club like tennis or golf). It was announced yesterday that a number of the students in my department not affiliated with clubs would be taking part in the "Christmas Volunteer" program (which, I assume, is where they will spend their precious winter holiday picking up litter and generally doing menial shit around the city, not that they have any real choice in the matter).
Can you imagine what would have happened if they had said to us, back in the December of 95, "by the way lads, you're in the Christmas volunteer program, so report to the front office every day at 8am and walk around wearing a big ribbon stabbing rubbish with a pointed stick." It wouldn't have been pretty..
Incidentally, next Friday will be a huge day. The CEO of Microsoft (that is, the man one step down from Chairman Bill Gates) is coming to our school, and I have to prepare a written history of the school and generally be on hand to create a good impression. It's in every sense a huge deal and is possibly the most important moment in the school's long history of important moments (due to the potential for partnerships and business associations in the future). Here's hoping I don't go all Allan Partridge and make him smell a big cheese on a fork...
posted by Kenyon at 12:10 am
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