Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Eighty Deux

Wednesday is a plethora of mischief, random nuttiness tends to see me on the market barking at chavs to get their sticky mitts off of my merchandise. I'm curretly ill as fook and your twisted rant has been affording me some healing in the form of the Goleneye face off with two minors, Target renegade memories and heros of pudding. That the best thing if anything about England as I'm sure you've mentioned before. Down the Cornwamllis on a saturday night, working into the wee hours carting shitty plates and pints of Lager betwixt hotel and marquee, all the soupcons of this and filigrees of that were all well and good, but it was always sticky toffee or bread and butter or banoffee pudding. Don't mess with the important bit!!

I hate being ill. I've just been told by johnny alpha that he brought the foul DNV sickness back from Iraq with him and everyones had it here. Apparently I'm not supposed to drink beer, eat spicy food or consume any dairy. That about starves my repitoire of diet. I've just finished munching through a Chinese a la Jimmy-san regardez des las suspicious curry and weird red sauce with too many colourings, and swilling a kronenbourg just to kill the bug and get those white-blood cells in a blue shirt and round the rugby posts and back. Now I find out it's the metaphorical equivalent of skipping games to play refresher polo in C7 and watching helm snort a bag of salt and vinegar chipsticks. Ace.

Anyhooz, wednesdays are weird and thursdays weirder still. Fridays are rapidly becoming odd and saturdays are just strange. Last Sunday I took the woman to the gibralter gardens for an "all you can eat" Sunday roast. For £7.95 you get given a plate which you can cram full of as many ingredients as it will contain before spilling all over your fellow diners. I got told that five slices of beef was a little too many, but they would overlook this fact for the time being if I concealed them underneath my four yorkshires, twelve roasties and sack of carrots. After pouring a half litre of gravy over the mix I had to balance it carefully as it was sloshing all over the place. I got back to my place and fruitarian girlfriend Frejya had the dubious pleasure of watching me put it all away with a beer on the side whilst she nibbled at three mushrooms and a few carrots. She didn't even get any gravy becuase it had suspicious lumps of sytringy fat luirking in it. So massive meals and suapicious ingredites aside. I feel like complete shit and now am moving off to bedfordshire to shiver in the heat. Damn these winter chills!

EiGhTy oNe

It's a Wednesday, the worst day of my week, and thanks to a colleague forgetting to buy filter papers, there will be no coffee today... I have to go and teach in about 20 minutes, and it's the one class a week that I openly dread... they don't speak a word of English, I hardly speak a word of Japanese, potato, potarto, tomato, tomarto, let's call the whole thing off...

Anyway, apparently this Friday's class movie will be the latest offering in the Harry Potter franchise. It will be my first exposure to it, apart from reading a few pages in a book that was lurking around your house on the night before we went paintballing (incidentally, yours and Johnny Alpha's style of waking me up were rather different... you appeared in the doorway with a cup of coffee and a ripe pun, and Johnny opened every door of his house, put the music from the battle of britain on full volume and shouted commands as if under attack (at 5am no less)..

By the way, please email me your home address (or at the address that you collect mail from), as you birthday present is ready and waiting to be dispatched...

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Oh, we've reached golden "80" PS: you are a fluffy white gonad called fusse

Ach! Cutting thy jibes! Wail upon thee with my dostevei so I will!

nice to hear that ye are all well and comfy moving in despite the hissing and the low amounts of sweetner in the vegetable broth. The silver guns i cannae fathom, But I'm sure that Freyja would love them none the less (she LOVES the guns!!) anyhooz, we are all sick here @ the end of novembie but looking forward to getting my own place wi ma boniie lash. January 26th the date to be sure!

so it looks like we are heading that way towaRDS being mutually owned by the fairer sex, and nae bother to dsay the leasyt. Plus you can't curse the tennis girls, specifically for their short skirts and long legs!

Monday, November 28, 2005

Seventy ninE

Grief! Like an Eye bus you are! On time and punctual you are not! Troubled my brow! Accept a host of excuses I won't!

Well November has pretty much been and gone... things at school are ok, although the long-awaited class bowling tournament is to be scrapped in favour of watching a movie and going shopping (curse those fucking girls with their short skirts and tennis legs).

In other news, I read a book to stand almost alongside but actually a few paces behind Shogun and Tai pan, namely The Wind Up Bird Chronicles by Murakami. Superb stuff. Goldeneye was on Japanese tv a few nights ago, but travesties were abound, as they cut so much out of it that it barely resembled the original film. I'd estimate that a good 15 minutes was jettisoned, mostly due to the ludicrous way that instead of pausing the film, showing the adverts and resuming, the tv company decided to not pause the film, show the adverts and then jump back into the movie after a 2 minute gap. TWATS!

In other other news, my fiance and thine truly have signed the papers and are now on the brink of moving into our new apartment. Well, actually I will be moving in on the 23rd December, and Yoko will follow me after January 1st (it's a long, traditionalist story, full of hissing relatives, silver guns and plates of sour vegetables).

I do hope that I haven't moved in by the time you reply to this...

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Seventy Skate

Oh the humour....whenever i try and send emails this computer encounters spyware problems and shuts down! Grrr! This is the only PC that i have access to as well! Gnnnr! This area of the world is so backwards! Raaaa!!!

Saturday, November 12, 2005

7eventy 7even

Welcome back! By God, I thought the Cheam Cartel had finally nabbed ye...

Let's see... the techology I'm currently "loving" (shakes head, removes spectacles in a very middle aged way and rests them on the table) is probably the stupendous satellite navigation they have in some cars in Japan. Also, the mind-bogglingly swish digital cameras...

I had heard something about V, although not that it was being postponed. Trust the government to fudge a release date. Silly men in suits...

Friday, November 11, 2005

76 and not a damn sight too soon.

Yes, apologies are indeed in order, but with no pc and therefore no internet, it is extremly hard to progress anywhere with anyfomr of blog communication.
Hells, I'm now working in a headshop selling bongs and pipes and throws and rugs and drums and poi and skins and I don't start until.....10 oclock! it's wicked!

So anyways, in the land of tech, what are you currently loving?

Also did you hear that V for vendetta the movie has been postponed until further notice in the uk because of "political sensitivity?" Wankers!

Grrrr!